http://www.takimag.com/blogs/JZmirak.xml The Online Magazine for Independent Conservatives, edited by Taki Theodoracopulos en zmirak@hotmail.com Copyright 2008 2008-05-16T12:01:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/sobering_thoughts/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/sobering_thoughts/#When:12:01:00Z There’s nothing to put a damper on your columns about food and wine like a grumpy old doctor who tells you have to lose 50 pounds. A dour World War II Navy veteran, he was the only Cigna doctor with an open appointment, and I had some symptoms that needed checking out. “I had a man in here last week,” he said in that sour-apple Yankee accent one hears up here on the lips of skinny men with wispy beards outside Dunkin Donuts (there’s one every 300 feet, it seems, in New Hampshire). “His blood sugar went up 300 percent in … Alcohol, Tobacco & Firearms 2008-05-16T12:01:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/the_world_without_roe_v_wade/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/the_world_without_roe_v_wade/#When:03:46:00Z As someone who originally got engaged in politics because of the Life issue, it might sound strange that I am desperately eager for the issue to be rendered moot. Or at least non-partisan. I am always happy, for instance, when pro-life Democrats win—as a good one did recently in my beloved 2nd home, Louisiana. Best of all, he beat Woody Jenkins, the kind of piranha who gives us right-wing nutjobs a bad name. (Imagine Gordon Liddy without the humor—no “Stacked and Packed” calendars for Woody.) I know a good bit about Jenkins because one of my friends used to date his … Life 2008-05-14T03:46:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/when_johnny_came_lurching_home/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/when_johnny_came_lurching_home/#When:12:00:00Z Perhaps the greatest compensation for trading cramped digs in Rome for a spacious house in the U.S. is that I have my beagles back. Susie and Franz-Josef are out back now, sniffing the trails of long-scampered squirrels, and howling merrily for blood. One advantage of living in New Hampshire instead of New York is that “out back” refers to the spacious yard—not to an alley full of metal trash cans. And I have a nice big rented house. On the other hand, I’m trapped there, since I don’t have a driver’s license. (Haven’t driven since 1996, and forgot to renew the … Alcohol, Tobacco & Firearms 2008-05-09T12:00:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/sometimes_a_racist_always_a_slut/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/sometimes_a_racist_always_a_slut/#When:13:00:00Z Should pro-lifers keep citing Margaret Sanger’s scathingly racist statements, and her program of eugenics—which directly influenced Hitler, and led to laws in a dozen or so American states forcibly sterilizing or even castrating thousands of the “unfit” who flunked primitive I.Q. tests? Good question. What matters most is whether such a rhetorical attack works at undermining liberal and non-white support for abortion. In my own long experience in the pro-life movement, it is occasionally useful, but rarely conclusive. It helps sow doubt about the motives of one’s opponents, and might tilt the occasional lefty towards becoming more ambivalent about abortion and … 2008-05-06T13:00:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/fascist_statues_calvados_and_vicodin/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/fascist_statues_calvados_and_vicodin/#When:00:08:00Z I just flew in from Rome, and boy is my liver tired. Given the turbulence you get in trans-Atlantic flights—this was only my third flight from Europe—a high-strung sanguine choleric like me needs some kind of chemical cocktail to keep him from panicking every time the Airbus goes Boeing-Boeing-Boeing. I used to take a leftover dental Vicodin and wash it down with a half dozen or so digestivi, but then I found out how addictive those little pills are, and anyway SwissAir went bankrupt, so no more Calvados and no more poire William. On to Xanax, British Airways and unlimited G&Ts. … 2008-05-03T00:08:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/site/article/benedict_on_the_border_a_showdown_of_church_and_nation_state/ http://www.takimag.com/site/article/benedict_on_the_border_a_showdown_of_church_and_nation_state/#When:00:17:00Z With the visit of Pope Benedict to the U.S., American Catholics are faced with a grave confrontation between Church and State, a conflict between their supernatural faith and their patriotic duty, unparalleled in the English-speaking world since Pope Pius V deposed Queen Elizabeth I—and encouraged Catholics in her realm to topple her from power. Right? That’s what you’d think, from reading the statements of open-borders activists alongside the complaints of restrictionist ex-Catholics like Tom Tancredo. In fact, the current argument is much more complicated, and reflects millennia of tension between the notion of national sovereignty and the universal claims of Christian … 2008-04-30T00:17:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/btich_slapping_barack/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/btich_slapping_barack/#When:13:00:00Z As a son of a letter carrier, as someone who only got interested in politics because of the social issues--I was inspired by the heroic housewife Ellen McCormack, who ran for the Democratic nomination on the right of unborn children to escape the abortionists’ knife-- I have a complicated reaction to Barack Obama. After hearing his spiel about men like my father, I can’t help wanting to walk up to that cafe au lait huckster and smack him across the face before the square-headed ex-Marines of the Secret Service pummel me into submission. But the problem is that I KNOW that … 2008-04-24T13:00:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/nothing_but_the_war/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/nothing_but_the_war/#When:12:00:00Z Sunday’s NY Times story talks about the divergences between one-time running mates (and popular vote winners) Al Gore and Joseph Lieberman. Noting that Lieberman has moved to the “right” by becoming hawkish on Iraq, while Gore has moved to the “left” by staying true to his initial skepticism about that war, and becoming an activist on the subject of global climate change. Lieberman has gone so far as to start campaigning for John McCain--leading some lefties to wonder if they should try (again) to take him out of the Senate. But no: “A member of the Senate Democratic leadership, who insisted … 2008-04-22T12:00:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/love_among_the_bones/ http://www.takimag.com/blogs/article/love_among_the_bones/#When:21:35:00Z Some months ago I blogged lightheartedly about the “bone church” in Rome, whose crypt is entirely decorated with the disassembled skeletons of friars. But today I actually went there—a starkly different experience, and one that provoked a few sharp thoughts about the task which faces us on the Right. The Church of the Immaculate Conception is a haunting little brown, stone parish that stands incongruous on the chic Via Veneto—like the skull which always winks out of a painting of “Vanitas.” There’s “vita” here, all right, but I wouldn’t call it “dolce.” Underneath a church that’s fairly ordinary by Italian standards—which … 2008-04-18T21:35:00-05:00 http://www.takimag.com/sniperstower/article/ny_times_not_ready_for_prime_time/ http://www.takimag.com/sniperstower/article/ny_times_not_ready_for_prime_time/#When:01:02:00Z Here I am, sitting in Rome at 3 AM, listening to the Klezmatics and reading the NY Times’ coverage of the pope’s visit to the U.S., and I notice that the paper of record has posted a story that isn’t yet edited: It’s full of repetitions, and editorial shortcuts such as TK ("To Kome") and CK ("Check"). It reminds me of the fabled magazine photo that went to press with the following caption: “Somebody stick a caption on this thing, already--it’s 11pm and some of us have to get home.” I reproduce the story below in full, with errors in bold, … 2008-04-18T01:02:00-05:00