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Entry: Learning Not to Choke Link: http://www.takimag.com/site/article/learning_not_to_choke#10434 Post contents: Who the hell needs self-respect when one has Jamesons? How could anyone retain any shred of self respect when quaffing lukewarm Guiness? Self respect would be an unreasonable check on the murderous mayhem of the fine sport of Hurling. Ireland has done fully well fine without self-respect since the Druids skulked about the Oaken Wood. One does not need self respect when a certain black frisson of cheerfully consigned doom envelops one's countenance like a Connemara Fog. As to the tourists on 5th in Gotham.....Now that we've flat busted the American Consumer on the Foreigners Dime, it is an unmitigated pleasure to see both the oriental and occidental scurry out to Woodbury Commons by the busload, dropping their Euro, Yen and Yuan bought dollars in our cash registers. I understand that the Latin American Oligarchy is also helping to prop up our whooped housing market by purchasing expensive refuges in Houston gated communities and New York Penthouses. After all, with Carnival coming north with Global Warming, perhaps the Banana Republichood of Norte America cannot be far behind for this properly softened up Gringo and his beloved Nanny Security State. The only thing more depressing than watching European Soccer in America is watching the New York Giants play football in England. But, to be sure, the absolute most depressing sporting event in all history, aside from that wonderfully arcane and fragrant event of Afghani Goat Carcass Polo is the current tour of American Monster Truck Rodeo storming the land of the Vikings to wondrous applause. Monster Truck Rodeo in Socialist Scandinavia has eclipsed those remote control camel races in Arabia as one of the worst apocalyptic signs of late. Sent at: 2008 07 24