Maria Carraciola

May 28, 2010

When we pointed out two weeks ago that Fergie was strapped for cash, we never anticipated the chaos that would happen next. The perpetually hapless Duchess of York was caught on video last week trying to sell access to former husband Prince Andrew. An intrepid undercover reporter from News of the World posed as a wealthy businessman and made a covert deal to meet the Duke, with Fergie reportedly taking $40,000 in cash before a total deal of $725,000 to make an introduction that would “open doors” for the reporter. After Fergie found out about the sting, she made a tearful apology for her “serious lapse in judgment” but, strangely enough, hasn’t shied away from the spotlight. Her children’s book is getting a higher run (which means more money in the flame-haired wheeler-and-dealer”€šÃ„ôs pockets) and she”€šÃ„ôs making a splashy appearance on Oprah this Tuesday. If there’s no such thing as bad publicity, perhaps this is exactly what the desperate woman wanted all along? As for the other half of the scandal, Andrew, who supposedly knew nothing of his ex”€šÃ„ôs plotting, has remained mum.

Crown Princess Victoria is living it up before next month’s wedding to fianc”ˆš© Daniel Westling. While at her brother Prince Carl Phillip’s birthday party, the Swedish beauty was stolen away by a group of masked men”€šÃ„îbut not to fear, it was only a joke to kick start her bachelorette party. She partied around Stockholm with friends and then sailed around the coast (no reporters allowed onboard, of course, she’s not nearly as dim as Fergie). Sister Madeleine was also there, and there”€šÃ„ôs no doubt her cheating ex-fiance Jonas Bergstrom was a lively topic of conversation. There’s only a few weeks to go before Victoria”€šÃ„ôs wedding”€šÃ„îlet”€šÃ„ôs hope there”€šÃ„ôs no bombshell allegations waiting to ruin the summer nuptials.

On the other side of the pond, the details of Peter and Jacqui Getty’s ill-fated marriage keep getting uglier. Peter, the Getty oil heir who has a strange penchant for knitting (although that’s still better than his other reported extracurricular activities), was accused by Jacqui of being a cocaine addict and once breaking her arm in 2008. Beyond the Mercedes, Parisian couture, and million-dollar bed, Jacqui said there was a dark side to being a “Getty wife.” Peter lived like Henry VII, one source says, self-absorbed and in resplendent wealth. The trial’s ongoing, but the settlement of the billionaire couple is expected to be sky-high.

Daphne Guinness, “fashion”€šÃ„ôs invisible muse,” was the subject of a rather long, glowing profile lately. Our favorite details were her comments about paramour Bernard-Henri Levy, and her musing on the fact that he”€šÃ„ôs still married to his wife: “He”€šÃ„ôs the most wonderful person in the whole world and he makes me very happy and I hope that it will all work out eventually.” Perhaps his wife, actress Arielle Dombasle, doesn’t feel the same way? Daphne also said she’s far from high-maintenance”€šÃ„îshe wears a Rick Owens T-shirt and leggings to the gym. Should we mention that shirt would cost around $300, or does that ruin the casual aura she was going for?

Congratulations are in order for Alicia Keys. The songstress packed a double punch in a recent announcement”€šÃ„îshe’s engaged and pregnant. The lucky soon-to-be husband is music producer Swizz Beatz and the couple will tie the knot later this year when they’re in a “New Marriage State of Mind.”

But while Alicia is busy dishing out her own gossip, another famous belter may have something to hide. Mariah Carey just dropped out of Tyler Perry’s new movie because her “doctors advised her not to [do it],” said her publicist, and now everyone’s whispering that she’s pregnant. Mariah, who’s 41, and much younger husband Nick Cannon have hinted for years they’d like to start a family, so maybe this is finally the right moment.

Another Ponzi schemer similar to the much-hated Bernie Madoff has surfaced”€šÃ„îand so has an unlikely hero who may have saved her celebrity friends millions. Uma Thurman was swindled out of a cool million by accountant Kenneth Starr before she stormed into his office and demanded it back”€šÃ„îand then raised a red flag about Starr’s dealings. Other clients include Wesley Snipes, Sly Stallone, and Al Pacino. Starr was supposedly pocketing their investments (up to $30 million total) or giving their money to his ex-stripper wife. Martin Scorsese and Annie Leibovitz were a few of the lucky ones and took back their money before things headed south. There’s some good news. This time, Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick, who lost millions to Madoff, seem to have escaped unharmed.

If Sandra Bullock‘s very public life appears to have quieted down a bit, that may be due to her astounding ability to evade the paparazzi. She and baby Louis Bardo have been in Los Angeles for weeks, yet there isn’t a photo to be found of mom and child. She will be heading to the MTV Movie Awards the first week of June. Any guesses as to how many more times Jesse James will try to get his apologetic face mugging on TV before then? Of course we felt sorry for him during his tearful interview on Nightline when he said his father abused him, but we’d feel even better if we didn”€šÃ„ôt have to see him at all.

In the most unsurprising news of the week, Lindsay Lohan was spotted out partying after her court appearance over her outstanding DUI charge. She has a brand-new and very exclusive accessory”€šÃ„îan ankle bracelet called SCRAM that monitors her alcohol intake. Although she’s not drinking anymore and switched to Red Bulls, she does want to make the most of her new situation, and even asked Chanel if they would help decorate the black eyesore around her ankle so she could at least wear a chic dress. One day soon we hope that brilliant mind will be put to better use.