The barbershop in question is known as Mr. G.’s Hair Design Studios. And wait a minute”€”the suspect was described as “€œbalding.”€ Maybe the dude has some serious hair issues and sought to carry out a terrorist bombing in retaliation for what he felt was a substandard and overpriced haircut? At the end of the day, this might ultimately wind up to be nothing more than one of the most underwhelming African American hair-salon bombings in American history.

Another prominent theory…well, it just occurred to me…is that the NAACP tried to pull off a hate-crime hoax to raise funds, but just to be dicks they made sure to detonate the bomb outside the barbershop so their own office would emerge without a scratch. (By the way, is the NAACP ever going to change that “€œColored People”€ part of their name? I hope not. I rather like it. As a kid, the term “€œColored People”€ gave me the impression that everyone on the assembly line starts out white, then some people have artificial coloring added at a certain juncture.)

Some have alleged that a Google Earth photo proves that the meager smudge from the alleged bombing was already there on the side of the building last September and that the whole shebang is one big hoax.

Or maybe this bombing was a Top Secret CIA/NSA/FBI/IRS/SPLC false-flag operation of some sort?

Or maybe nothing happened at all?

Friends, I simply don”€™t know enough facts to reach a conclusion about what actually happened, but personally, I”€™m pulling for it to be a hoax. For a man of my tastes, hate crime hoaxes are the only enjoyable, quality public entertainment available anymore on this dismal American cultural landscape.


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