February 22, 2008

The Old Gray Lady and the Tramp

That phony story about John McCain and Vicky Iseman, which the New York Times ballyhooed as an “exclusive,” is so typical of the Old Bag. But Bill Keller’s (the executive editor of the Times) response, that he stands by the story and the rest of the bull, brought back memories. During the ’80s in London, one of the town’s most…er…shall we say receptive-to-male-charms young woman was one Emma Gilbey, a short and squat female who was known for her tantrums when and if a boyfriend refused to follow her home but stayed behind in a nightclub with his buddies. I speak from experience as she went out not only with me but many of my buddies.

Having run out of friends in London, la Gilbey moved to New York where she continues to spread ill will, this time among the journalists in Washington and the Big Bagel. She began to date the junior senator from Massachusetts, one John Kerry, and was proud to announce to me that he would only make love to her in the back of his limo. (Wise man, Kerry, limos don’t talk, unlike hotel rooms). She so insisted on the fact that once, during a White House Correspondents dinner, I shouted at him as he made his way through the throngs: “Is it true, senator, that you like to do it in the back of limos?” He turned and gave me such a dirty look it confirmed it.

Soon after Emma Gilbey began an affair with one Bill Keller, a married man with two children working at the Times. In no time at all, she got herself pregnant, and Mr. Keller had to divorce his wife and leave his two children while Emma awaited the birth. The pair were soon married and lived happily ever after. So, when Keller decided to run this bullshit article in order to hurt McCain’s chances at the brass ring, he must have remembered the stolen moments with Gilbey, the cheap hotel rooms, the furtive telephone calls preceding the assignations. I suppose it was only normal that he believed that McCain was like him. Well, Keller is not a soldier and never will be and never could have been one, so he shouldn’t compare himself to McCain. Soldiers are honorable, journalists are liars and fakes.

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