September 01, 2016

Source: Bigstock

Sure, Milo’s investors are expecting an actual scholarship or two to be handed out, but I”€™d wager they didn”€™t sign anything stipulating the exact metrics of how that’s supposed to play out. So Milo probably has to award only a couple thousand dollars in college dough in order to claim fulfillment. If there’s a discrepancy between the amount raised and the amount awarded, he can always blame the deficit on the left. “€œIt costs a lot to defend our ambitious plans against attacks from SJWs”€”if you stop donating now, the bad guys win.”€ Milo’s a smart guy; I”€™m sure he’s covered himself well.

Trump, that’s another story. Technically, Trump has two ways of not coming through for his true believers. First, and most obviously, he can blow the election and lose. Anyone my age understands how one blown line can come to define a presidential debate. Think Jerry Ford and Eastern Europe. Do you think anyone on Team Trump is instructing him to avoid “€œbleeding from wherever”€ lines during his debates with Clinton? And if they are, will he listen?

But the second Trump path to true-believer disappointment is perhaps even worse in the long run. Trump could actually become president and end up having to “€œsoften”€ everything, including the sacred wall. In short (and I”€™ve brought this up in previous columns), Trump could become Schwarzenegger, the He-Man turned Girlie Man. This is actually a much worse scenario for Trump than losing. If he wins, he”€™ll have expectations to live up to. Trump is probably aware of how poorly Schwarzenegger’s post-politics acting “€œcomeback”€ has gone. Seen the film where Arnold has to protect his zombie daughter from zombie hunters? No one has. The guy’s gone from the A list to the bargain DVD bin at Walmart. Some of that can be blamed on age and changing public tastes, but a certain amount can definitely be chalked up to his piss-poor performance as governor. He never pleased liberals enough for them to forget how, at one time, he was “€œliterally Hitler,”€ and he never pleased conservatives enough for them to see him as anything but Lowell Weicker with steroids and a bastard Guatemalan son. Trump is likely aware of how failing in office affected Schwarzenegger’s box office and public image, and it’s probably not a scenario he desires for himself.

If Trump blows the election, he can (as Milo can) blame it on the left, on the media, and on establishment conservatives. He can remain a hero. A bloodied but unbowed hero. Speculative reporting last week suggested that Trump plans to “€œmonetize”€ his followers should he lose by creating an alt-right media empire. And while I”€™m unconvinced that this was his game plan all along, it does make a certain amount of sense that he”€™d want to have a plan in place to further shear his true believers in the event he goes down in flames in November.

Trump is already very similar to Milo”€”a preening, vainglorious media troll”€”and he could become even more so if he loses. Trump could become Milo minus the black dicks, raking in multimillions instead of hundreds of thousands from the dreams of his followers. Because it takes a lot to dampen the spirit of a true believer. Milo knows this, which is why he doesn”€™t seem even remotely fazed by the current accusations against him. Embezzlement? Who cares? Leslie Jones looks like a big stinky ape.

Milo knows the alt-right’s priorities.

For the inflexibly committed Trumpsters, I hope the speculation about a post-loss media empire is true. Because if so, it”€™ll mean the dream doesn”€™t have to die with the concession speech. You won”€™t get your mass deportations or your wall, but you”€™ll still get monthly appeals for donations, and you”€™ll still get your “€œfeels.”€

And in the end, isn”€™t that what really matters?

Columnists

Sign Up to Receive Our Latest Updates!