My Party: The Stupid Party!

House Speaker Kevin McCarthy is being pressured by idiots like Reps. Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert to impeach Biden for his son Hunter's sleazy foreign dealings -- and thus decimate the reelection chances of every other Republican in Congress. But MJT and Boebert will have tremendous ...

Juarez, Mexico

Break the Law Again, You’ll Get Two Desserts!

Days after Mayor Eric Adams said the migrant crisis was going to "destroy" New York City, we memorialized the last time immigrants tried to destroy it: the 9/11 attack. At least that was a one-time body blow. The city suffered grievously, but survived because, luckily, the immigrants who flew ...

Couldn’t the Military Industrial Complex Make its Money in Mexico?

It's often hard to keep our Mexican atrocities straight, but would you happen to remember the 43 Mexican students in Iguala who disappeared off a bus in September 2014? At the time, there were claims that local police had abducted and killed them at the behest of a drug cartel -- hard as it might ...

Apparently, Not All Black Lives Matter

Let's be honest: As far as the media are concerned, most black lives don't matter. Only in the tiny, infinitesimally small percentage of cases when a black person is killed by a white guy do the media sit up and take notice. Thus, while there was blanket coverage of a white racist 21-year-old ...

We Need Immigration, Not Trump, At the Debate

Donald Trump, the least self-aware person in the country, at least seems to know that he's a terrible debater. He has the vocabulary of a kindergartener, strings words together in combinations that aren't recognizable as English and has absolutely no idea what he's talking about most of the time. ...

Ronald and Nancy Reagan, 1972

Debate Advice for Republicans: Issues, Not Oprah

As the first Republican debate approaches, I have an urgent appeal to the candidates: Please adopt the good things Donald Trump did and skip the catastrophic parts (i.e., everything after the campaign ended on Nov. 8, 2016). Although he presided over the most wasted presidency in history, the 2016 ...

How to Be a New York Times Reporter

You probably think the job of a reporter is to report news. How old-fashioned, cis-gendered, white supremacist of you! That's not it at all, certainly not at the august New York Times. Instead, a reporter's mission is to find out what kind of story would help the Democrats at any particular moment ...

BREAKING: Trump Still an Idiot

With the latest indictment of Donald Trump, special counsel Jack Smith has delivered a comprehensive and well-documented case establishing beyond cavil that Trump is a clown. Well, that's something we've never heard before! Oh no, sorry, I mean we've heard it every day for the past 2 1/2 years: It ...

Republican Pledge: No More Talking About Trump

The media are so desperate for Republicans to nominate Donald Trump that they've turned over 96.7% of their programming to covering him, with brief interruptions for Emmett Till updates. Like dogs playing a game of fetch for eternity, they never tire of rehashing Trump's legal troubles, his ...

Trump’s Endorsement Got DeSantis Nothing

Donald Trump is indignant that Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis would dare run for president when he KNOWS Trump is running. According to the former president and big baby, this is a betrayal of epic proportions because Trump endorsed DeSantis during his first gubernatorial run. (Whereas winning the ...