Delphina Boncompagni Ludovisi

Delphina Boncompagni Ludovisi

Delphi (aka Delphina Boncompagni Ludovisi) has been helping people since circa 580 B.C. Some of her most notable clients have included Philip the II of Macedon and Emperor Nero.

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries

The Algebra of Divorce

I’ve seen too many friends and acquaintances leap into “lightning marriages”—I am borrowing from the Italian phrase matrimoni lampo—as well as all the horrifying high-profile Hollywood cases such as Kim Kardashian’s recent split-second marital debacle, so I started to research the main ...

Cheating 101

Dear Delphi, I broke up with my daughter’s mother over a year ago, but I have been over to her place a few times and have slept with her. I love my current girlfriend very much and I have mostly stayed away from my ex, but my ex has said that she is going to talk to my GF and tell her everything. ...

Kid or Career?, Cringing Over Color, and Kicking the Concubine to the Curb

KID OR CAREER? Dear Delphi, I am 36 and am having my first baby, due in December. I am thrilled out of my mind—I have always wanted children—I can’t wait! The problem is, my husband wants me to quit my job and stay home with the baby. I think it is because I make more money and have a more ...

Radar Love, The Elixir of Jealousy, & Panic at the Country Club

RADAR LOVE Dear Delphi, My boyfriend keeps saying he needs space, and as a consequence we fight a lot. I have become so worried that he is trying to—or is going to—break up with me that I keep asking him about what he is doing, where he is going, and who he is going with so he knows it is OK ...

Swallowing More Than Pride, Happy Old (Possibly Gay) Bachelor, & The Musky Allure of Being Aloof

SWALLOWING MORE THAN PRIDE Dear Delphi, I keep asking all my friends, but I cannot get a straight answer: Is it OK if I do not swallow? I am 42 and married to a man of 40. We have two small children and everything is going just fine. I was at a play date for my oldest the other day when the topic ...

Curse of the Mega-Sore-Ass, Canine Kevorkian, & She Doesn’t Like You in That Way

CURSE OF THE MEGA-SORE-ASS Dear Delphi, I was at dinner the other night when my best friend’s new Texan love decided to share some appalling jokes. For example: “What do you call a queer dinosaur? A mega-sore-ass.” I was horrified and it is pretty safe to say everyone at the table was ...

God’s Views on Pregnancy, Going Abroad to Leave a Broad, & Baby Talk Among Adults

GOD’S VIEWS ON PREGNANCY Dear Delphi, My husband and I have been married since we were 25 and I have been trying to get pregnant for the past five years. I want to try in-vitro fertilization, but he says it is not God’s plan. He is very religious—something I always loved and respected about ...

Hooters Casino Blues, Lowballing How Many You’ve Balled, and My Brother the Cockblocker

HOOTERS CASINO BLUES Dear Delphi, My best friend of more than twenty years and I decided to have a boys’ long weekend in Vegas just for laughs before we get any further into our middle age. The problem is, my best friend insisted on making the arrangements and has gone and booked a single room ...

Man and Woman by Fernando Botero

Fear of an Alpha Female, Afraid of a Spinster Daughter, and Terrified He’ll Never Pop the Question

FEAR OF AN ALPHA FEMALE Dear Delphi, I am a 53-year-old man at the very start of a relationship with a very beautiful, affluent, and powerful woman. The problem is that I think she may be too spoiled to handle the truth—this woman has been “Yes’d” to death by sycophants and hangers-on for ...

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No Nudes is Good Nudes, Bird-Dogging Brother, and Tossing Out Used Tarts

NO NUDES IS GOOD NUDES Dear Delphi, I was out and about in London the other day when the World Naked Bike Ride went whizzing and flapping and jiggling by me. It was one big disgusting pink blob on wheels! Maybe I am a prude, but I don’t think that people should be biking in public in the ...


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