The Week’s Most Spaying, Swaying, and Mother’s Daying Headlines WORDS ARE VIOLENCE! (SO IS VIOLENCE) America’s trannies rank among the greatest inventors of our time. True innovators, like George Washington Self-Carver, Androgene ...

The Week’s Most Husking, Busking, and Elon Musking Headlines BANNED, ON THE RUN The danger in being a merciless tyrant is that if your regime is toppled, those to whom you showed no mercy will repay the unkindness a thousandfold once ...

The Week’s Most Swaying, Braying, and Earth-Daying Headlines BLACK FACE IN BLACKFACE For the professional blackface hunter, that dogged activist who ferrets out and cancels anyone who dares to wear blackface, times are lean. Average ...

The Week’s Most Shining, Pining, and Passover-Wining Headlines GIVING UP DECENCY FOR LENT Lent used to be about resisting evil. Now one church is making it about giving in. After all, what better way to show devotion to God than by ...

The Week’s Most Calming, Psalming, and Sunday-Palming Headlines THE BIG APPLE’S GENDERLESS WORMS NYC mayor Eric Adams has a hard life. Like getting court orders to smother toddlers with unnecessary masks, and then partying maskless ...

The Week’s Most Grueling, Drooling, and April-Fooling Headlines SLAPPY BLACK Once again, an onstage disaster has overshadowed the Best Picture win of a woke film. In 2017, the Warren Beatty/Faye Dunaway envelope mix-up upstaged the ...

The Week’s Most Shaking, Baking, and Spring-Breaking Headlines STAR TREK: THE NEXT DEFECATION Sci-fi has a long history of calling things wrong. Blade Runner predicted a 2019 L.A. with no Mexicans except Edward James Olmos. Back to ...

The Week’s Most Raving, Enslaving, and Daylight-Saving Headlines HARMADUKE A world run by dogs wouldn’t be so bad, especially considering the mess humans have made of things. Dog World would be very close to utopia. Belly rubs ...

The Week’s Most Caddying, Daddying, and St. Paddying Headlines FAUXPRAH’S BOOK CLUB Leftist author Laurie Penny is half-Irish, half-Jewish. How can you spot an Irish Jew? She thinks the IRA is a retirement account. She joined Sinn ...

The Week’s Most Straining, Sustaining, and Ukraining Headlines SKOR-ZANY Otto Skorzeny epitomized “strange bedfellows.” The Waffen-SS Obersturmbannführer was the Errol Flynn of the Third Reich, performing feats of derring-do for ...

The Week’s Most Scrutinizing, Glutenizing, and Putinizing Headlines PUTIN OUT-TRUDEAUS TRUDEAU The “Trudeau Doctrine” is very simple: If there’s even one Nazi flag at a peaceful protest, the entire protest is Nazi and must be ...

The Week’s Most Degrading, Upbraiding, and Ukraine-Invading Headlines WAG THE DOG-EARED In a 2004 episode of The Wire, drug kingpin and would-be legitimate businessman Stringer Bell gets “rainmade” by shifty city hall power ...