Why I Kissed a G-Man

Taki's Top Drawer

Why I Kissed a G-Man

Her vulgarity and crassness aside, Paris Hilton is butt ugly, tout court. With her, it was go from the very minute her white trash parents began to exhibit her in New York nightclubs. She has neither charm nor looks, lives in a drug and alcohol-induced haze and disguises her emptiness with impudence and nudity. The media love it. Murdoch millions await her.


Choose Pushkin

Taki's Top Drawer

Choose Pushkin

Thomas Lejus, a Moscow university graduate, was the first Soviet to be accepted to the Wimbledon draw after the war. An American friend of mine, “D,” (whom I cannot name because he is now a very big shot in D.C.) was also in the draw. He suggested we take Thomas out to lunch and get him to defect. “Do you know what this will do, if their first player defects ?…..” I agreed, and my friend and I invited Lejus to the Cafe Royal for lunch once he was out of the tournament. If memory serves, Lejus passed a round or two and on the second week the three of us met at Regent Street. After the boring opening pleasantries, “D” got to the point. I can actually repeat it word for word: “Look Thomas, If you leave the Soviet Union, we will give you a house near Washington which will have a refrigerator, and a Ford convertible with a hard roof, one that retracts even while you’re driving…” He made a sign with his hand how the roof worked. I remained silent. Then, after a long pause, Thomas answered.

Slumming with Sarko Senior

Taki's Top Drawer

Slumming with Sarko Senior

The funny thing about Sarkozy being president of France is not his size, but his family. His father, Pal Sarkozy, used to frequent the same nightclubs I did back in the early Sixties. Of the beau monde he was not. Pal was rather sleazy, a bit of a conman, and something of a playboy. None of us knew what he did, and by that I don’t mean to suggest he was dishonest, but there were always rumours about him. And an inveterate womaniser, a good thing for a father of a French president to be. But his women, alas, were a pretty lousy bunch.

Duty: The Sublimest Word

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Duty: The Sublimest Word

Robert E. Lee once said that duty is “the sublimest word in the English language.” Yes it is, but dodging duty has now become the operative word in the neocon language. They talk about supporting our troops and all that blather, but how many of these bloodthirsty donut eaters have ever answered the call of duty? The blood of America’s fighting men cannot indefinitely be spilled by a government made up of people who have avoided military duty, which is unwilling to meet the needs of those who have served.

Two Funerals and a Quagmire

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Two Funerals and a Quagmire

Another friend’s farewell, this time at West Point, where Commander Tim Vogel was buried with full military honours. Some of you oldies may have seen the film The Bridges of Toko-Ri, starring William Holden, Grace Kelly, Frederic March and Mickey Rooney. Holden played a pilot based on Tim’s father, a hot shot jet fighter who died in North Korea in 1951. The film had changed his name and presented him as a reluctant hero. Tim’s father was nothing of the kind. Sully Vogel was the strongest midshipman at Annapolis and became a legend in Korea for his aerial exploits. But Timmy outdid his old man. He won two DFC’s and 17 other awards for flying 200 missions over some of the most heavily defended real estate in North Vietnam, and set a record for successfully performing over 600 landings on a carrier. He and I became good friends after his return, and like most heroes he never talked about his exploits.

Who’s Cheering for Bin Laden?

Taki's Top Drawer

Who’s Cheering for Bin Laden?

During the German occupation of my homeland in the Second World War there were nightly shouts of “Vasta Rommel” by certain Greeks. “Vasta” in Greek means “Hold on.” In other words, Greeks were praying for the great Erwin Rommel to hold against Montgomery’s 8th army. The German officers who were billeted in our house were immensely flattered. Until, that is, Fraulein, my German nanny, informed them that those shouting “Vasta Rommel!” were black marketeers hoping for an Axis victory because that ensured bigger profits. The neo-cons are essentially shouting “Vasta Bin Laden!” The more bloodshed, chaos and disruption, the more it gives Israel the excuse to practice ethnic cleansing. The more the military-industrial complex thrives. The greater the hold of the neo-con influence within the White House.

Of Snobs and Slobs

Taki's Top Drawer

Of Snobs and Slobs

People to the manor born simply do not disapprove of those born in lesser circumstances than themselves. To the contrary, a duke is much more at ease with his dustman than with a hedge fund vulgarian who tries to ape the duke’s manner of speaking. Unlike in America, where one’s pocketbook is taken as one’s worth, an Englishman’s accent counts for more. Or used to, anyway. Even if one learns to fake it, like the great Lady Thatcher who took elocution lessons and spoke la-di-dah English, there are still all sorts of giveaways. For example: A drawing room is never called a lounge, except on a boat. A mirror is a looking glass, except in a car. Wireless is upper class for radio, and one simply never, but never calls a napkin a serviette.

Strip-search the Brits

Taki's Top Drawer

Strip-search the Brits

There are 800,000 British passport holders who can at any time come to the United States without a visa or subject to any controls. These Brits are all either Pakistani born and naturalized British subjects, or their sons or grandsons. Pakistani Britons travel to their ancestral land of Pakistan around — get this — 400,000 times per year. 400,000 trips are taken each year by Britons of Pakistani descent who are then free to arrive in the U.S. unmolested and uncontrolled and do their stuff. Jihadist ideology is the prevailing ideology….

…But Dreyfus was Innocent

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…But Dreyfus was Innocent

So we have come to this, have we? Israel is more important than the United States as far as certain Jewish Americans are concerned. Well, I don’t think so, and fervently hope Rosen and Weissman have the book thrown at them. A nation of immigrants like America simply cannot afford to have American citizens
betray Uncle Sam to the country of the origins of their forefathers or fathers.

The Karate Kid

Taki's Top Drawer

The Karate Kid

Oldies have a powerful lobby in America, even in sport. Take judo, for example. Last week I went down to Miami for the U.S. national judo
championships, a competition which decides who will represent Uncle Sam in next year’s Olympics. Along with the seniors, as the main competitors are
known as, there is also a master’s tournament. Age groups begin from 30 to 35, and so on. I was entered in the 70 to 75 group.


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