November 24, 2016

Source: Bigstock

The strangest part of all this is the total and utter confidence the other side has. Not long after Trump won, I sent a buddy a picture of a bowl in my dishwasher. It was upright and both of us regularly marvel at how bad our wives are at stacking the thing. I”€™ve known him for ten years and we”€™ve been on several family vacations together. Our kids are friends and we never talk politics. “€œI wish I could laugh at that,”€ he responded like Obi-Wan Kenobi talking to a baby Luke. “€œI [feel] the day may have come that we both know was probably coming…. Trump might be a deal breaker.”€ This is the first and last political discussion we will ever have. “€œGood run,”€ I said. “€œBye.”€ No debate. No questions asked. I would LOVE to debate anyone who has a problem with Trump. Is it the bus conversation that angers you? Are you making the logical mistake of guilt by association? Do you think he’s a bigot? I can give a million reasons why it’s time for a president who is “€œnot presidential,”€ but they refuse to consider any of it.

This is how far down the rabbit hole they have gone. It’s like you were just caught having an affair with your 14-year-old student. There’s no explaining yourself. You”€™re clearly a disgusting human being who has done something unforgivable and to hear your explanation is only going to gross us out so please don”€™t come to Thanksgiving. When I presented this analogy to Tommy Sotomayor (the ostracization black Trumpers get is a whole other column), he pointed out that not only was he disinvited to Thanksgiving, but the guy who replaced him was an actual pedophile! IT administrator Andrew has been banned from Thanksgiving by his own mother. “€œHer and my gay brother somehow think I personally got Trump elected and refuse to talk to me about it,”€ he said. “€œIt’s like they think I was his campaign manager.”€ Kory, a chef, also lost his sibling. “€œMy brother dumped me,”€ he joked. “€œHe was a fag anyways.”€ There seem to be very few cases of Trump supporters abandoning their liberal friends over this election. Like Charles Krauthammer says, “€œThey think we”€™re evil. We just think they”€™re wrong.”€ The evil isn”€™t even their own invention. It is, as Michael Goodwin said on Sunday, “€œthe caricature…the Democratic Party and the national liberal media created and that you swallowed hook line and sinker.”€

This Thanksgiving will likely be the most contentious of our generation and much of the family damage will be irreparable. My cousins are coming over from Chicago for the holidays. One of the dads is a Trump supporter and he’s in trouble with his wife too, but the only thing that will be off the table Thursday night is Tofurkey. We can discuss how we finally won this country after 400 years of warring with the Indians. We can get into how we rebuilt it from scratch after the Civil War. Hundreds of thousands of dads died to make this country great. We can spend some extra time in the doghouse. The holidays are all about love and that includes the tough love we are going to need to save America.


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