The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Faddy, Paddy, and Day-for-Daddy Headlines THE THIN BLACK LINE After a state trooper was killed last week by a drugged-up driver during a traffic stop in Wethersfield, Connecticut, the township council refused to fly the “thin blue line” flag in his memory. The majority-Democrat council declared the flag a “hate symbol.” As a consolation, the Dems agreed to fly the town’s LGBT Pride flag at half-staff (that’s not a joke), even though the trooper was not gay and left behind a wife and kids. But even that offer was a cruel joke; the Pride flag was already at ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Arboreal, Raptorial, and Day-of-Memorial Headlines EIN VOLK, EIN REICH, EIN FUROR It’s been widely reported that when Jimmy Carter was running for reelection, ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Hunching, Bunching, and Actor-Punching Headlines GENDERONIMO! American mass shootings have occurred everywhere. Schools, malls, churches, temples (Jew, Sikh, and ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Glomming, Aplombing, and Flowers-for-Momming Headlines BREAKING BAD (WIND) How do you know you’re the least popular American president in history? When you ...

Baton Rouge State Capitol

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Trying, Plying, and Cinco-de-Maying Headlines OFF THE BEATEN PATHOLOGICAL Tranny advocates can’t find their Matthew Shepard, the gay man “beaten, tortured, ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Fussing, Trussing, and Exodussing Headlines HOLLYWOOD MAGIC, HOLLYWOOD TRAGIC The anchor of the Universal Studios Hollywood theme park is the legendary tram ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Disaster-Heading, Needle-Threading, and Matzo-Breading Headlines PALM BLEEDINGS Remember Dionne Warwick’s Psychic Friends? Well, Danielle Cherakiyah Johnson ...

Alexandria Ocasio Cortez

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Gayish, Grayish, and Patriots’ Dayish Headlines TAKING IT UP THE BUTT(ERFLY) There was a time when leftists demanded that the entire world stand still for a ...

Lorne Michaels

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Bitter, Glitter, and Eid al-Fitr Headlines WE INTERRUPT YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAMADAN... Canadians are like sloths. It’s hard to hate sloths. They’re ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Funniest, Runniest, and Easter Bunniest Headlines GENTILE CLUBS, JEWISH BALLS In early-1900s West L.A., the WASP elites spent their leisure time at the Rancho ...

Austin, Texas

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Clingiest, Stringiest, and Springiest Headlines SXSS The South by Southwest (SXSW) film and music festival in Austin is no stranger to disruption. In 2014, a man ...

Los Angeles, California

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Bah, Blah, and Erin-Go-Bragh Headlines AN APPLE A DAY KEEPS THE TEACHER AWAY (HOPEFULLY) The Long Beach (California) Unified School District has paid $900,000 ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Glowering, Empowering, and Lose-an-Houring Headlines HEAP BAD DECISION The Telegraph has declared Americans “in revolt” against “green energy,” thanks ...

The Week That Perished

The Week’s Most Scion, Zion, and In-Like-a-Lion Headlines KURDS AND WHY Mohammed El-Kurd bills himself as “the first-ever Palestine correspondent for The Nation.” Though ...


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