March 23, 2015

Azealia Banks

The Week’s Queerest, Dearest, and Severest Headlines

The Harlem-born muff-diving female rapper named Azealia Banks has a reported net worth of $3 million, which is roughly $2,999,500 more than it would be if she had been born in Africa and was still living there.

Banks, who has previously groused of “€œhaving to consult a group of old white guys about my black girl craft“€ and Tweeted about how she has “€œsuch a general hatred for all white men”€ that she “€œmight have to kill one of these crackers in their sleep,”€ recently told Playboy:

I hate everything about this country. Like, I hate fat white Americans. All the people who are crunched into the middle of America, the real fat and meat of America, are these racist conservative white people who live on their farms. Those little teenage girls who work at Kmart and have a racist grandma”€”that’s really America…Black people need reparations for building this country, and we deserve way more f**king credit and respect.

“€œHow much”€”if any”€”black technology was involved in “€˜building this country”€™?”€

Since she seems to be all about “€œkeeping it real,”€ here are some real questions: How much”€”if any”€”black technology was involved in “€œbuilding this country”€? To what degree did black organizational skills play a part in “€œbuilding this country”€? Shouldn”€™t she spare a little gratitude for the whites who invented the recording technology that allows her to be a millionaire? Hmm? Huh?

And since she raised the blubbery specter of “€œfat white Americans,”€ perhaps she needs to realize that black Americans are 46% more likely to be obese than white Americans.

A video recently emerged that depicts a mob of blacks laughing and cheering as a white girl and her very young brother are ruthlessly beaten at an Indianapolis playground. The media apparently didn”€™t publicize this incident because they”€™ve been waiting”€”for decades now”€”to air footage of an equivalently lopsided white-on-black attack.

A sane, rational person”€”remember those?”€”might falsely assume that the U.S. Forest Service should focus its energies toward maintaining U.S. forests. Oh, how wrong they”€™d be.

Forest Management Director Bryan Rice“€”a Cherokee who once worked at the Bureau of Indian Affairs”€”recently sent an email to his underlings encouraging them to explore their own “€œunconscious bias”€ regarding race, obesity, disability, and sexuality. He also encouraged them to take Harvard’s Implicit Association Test, which is designed to allegedly measure racial bias but which we”€™ve already proven is a howling fraud.

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