October 01, 2017

Hugh Hefner

Hugh Hefner

Source: Wikimedia Commons

The Week’s Most Magnetic, Prophetic, and Apathetic Headlines

If Playboy founder and American icon Hugh Hefner had died a generation ago, he would have been fondly remembered not only as a publishing titan but as a champion of civil rights, free speech, and sexual liberation.

But since it’s the current year rather than a generation ago, angry women writers have come out like a horde of hornets to shit all over his corpse.

Since gender is obviously a fluid concept, we will include among such “angry women writers” the nominally male and suspiciously sweaty Paul Thornton of the LA Times, who claims without any scientific evidence that the “essential question” about Hefner was whether or not he was a “sexist.”

One might be tempted to flip the script and posit that the essential question about Paul Thornton is whether or not he ever enjoyed the pleasure of banging Barbi Benton.

GLAAD CEO Sarah Kate Ellis—yes, apparently celebrating the fact that you engage in raw acts of high-risk carnality with members of your own sex means you can also start a whole corporation about it—paused from gnawing on her partner’s beaver long enough to say she found it “alarming” that Hefner was being portrayed as some sort of good person instead of the woman-squashing hate-monster we all know he was:

It’s alarming how media is attempting to paint Hugh Hefner as a pioneer or social justice activist. Because nothing could be further from reality….Hefner was not a visionary. He was a misogynist. He built an empire sexualizing women & mainstreaming stereotypes that caused irreparable damage to women’s rights & our entire culture.

Were lesbians always this easily alarmed?

“Julie Bindel, no one in world history has ever wanted to see you naked.”

If you’re like us, you automatically assume that any woman named “Liz” is a lesbian. While this may or may not be true for Liz Posner of Salon.com, she admonishes us not to celebrate the passing of a “sexual predator” who was a “gross, powerful, white man.”

Taking the outrage up quite a few notches, the incurably ghastly Julie Bindel managed to make Hefner sound even cooler than he actually was by labeling him a “sadistic pimp”:

To claim that Hefner was a sexual liberationist or free speech idol is like suggesting that Roman Polanski has contributed to child protection….On hearing that the pimp and pornographer Hugh Hefner had died this morning, I wished I believed in hell….Now he is dead I would imagine the scores of women he abused will come forward and force his liberal supporters to see him for what he really was—sexist scum of the lowest order.

Julie Bindel, no one in world history has ever wanted to see you naked. And the day you finally pass into the next life, we hope someone uses that last sentence in your obituary. We’re offering it for free.

Last Sunday a 25-year-old black man allegedly born in Sudan shot up the Burnette Chapel of Christ in Antioch, TN. He killed 38-year-old Melanie Crow Smith and wounded at least eight others, including himself.

Among the wounded were the church’s minister Joey Spann and his wife Peggy.

Police took accused gunman Emanuel Kidega Samson to the hospital, where he was treated for injuries before being returned into custody.

Samson’s social-media posts reveal a deeply disgruntled—seriously, he didn’t seem gruntled at all—black man obsessed with black-identity politics and white supremacy and police brutality and all the other topics that ensure that black men who myopically fixate on them and never pause to smell the roses may ruin their chance at ever escaping their chronic disgruntlement and embarking on a new life blessed with never-ending waves of gruntling and regruntling.

The major American news media has wisely chosen not to make a big deal out of this story for fear that it might unnecessarily cause racial tension.


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