March 06, 2017

This is a story of love, hate, interracial romance, journalistic malpractice, and anti-Semitic bomb hoaxes.

It involves a young black man named Juan, whose mother named him that because Juan was enough”€”just kidding! Juan is an extremely black man, the color of a coffee bean, the color of dirty motor oil, the color of the dark Arabian night, the color of hell with all the fires put out. He has not ever been, nor will he ever be, mistaken for a member of The Beach Boys.

Last Thursday federal agents arrested 31-year-old Juan Thompson of St. Louis and charged him with cyberstalking an ex-girlfriend by “€œcommunicating threats to JCCs [Jewish Community Centers] in the woman’s name.”€ If the allegations turn out to be true, Thompson engineered what is simultaneously one of the most inept hate-crime hoaxes and pathetic jilted-lover revenge schemes in black American history, and for that he should perhaps be awarded his own postage stamp.

As the story goes, Thompson lost his marbles after being dumped last summer by a “€œradical”€ white girl.

“€œWhen I hear of a disgraced black communist trying to frame his white liberal ex-girlfriend for anti-Semitic bomb threats, am I the only one who thinks “€˜Oscar contender”€™?”€

According to the federal criminal complaint, the melanin-laden knucklehead began sending “€œdefamatory”€ emails and faxes to his ex’s employer shortly after being kicked to the curb like a dirty piece of obsolete farming equipment. Thompson variously accused her of possessing child porn and wantonly spreading herpes. He also emailed the ADL in February, naming his girlfriend and warning them that she was going to make anti-Semitic bomb threats the next day. He”€™d also sent a nearly identical warning to a Jewish Community Center in San Diego”€”more or less, “€œMy crazy ex-girlfriend hates Jews and is going to make a bomb threat against you tomorrow.”€

Pause for a moment to consider how galaxy-smashingly dumb that is. Everyone in his right mind who’s tried to frame an ex-girlfriend for an anti-Semitic bomb threat knows that you make the bomb threat first…then you call the ADL to rat out your girlfriend for it. What kind of putz doesn”€™t know this?

Despite the fact that Trump is the most slavishly philo-Semitic president I can imagine short of, say, Rahm Emanuel and an IDF guerrilla squad staging a White House coup, the accusations of his alleged “€œanti-Semitism”€ have been loud and long and relentless. A highly publicized spate of anti-Jewish bomb threats and cemetery desecrations nationwide have only emboldened the drumbeat for Trump to “€œrenounce”€ or “€œdisavow”€ these alleged events”€”which he’s done several times, despite having nothing to do with them. He was also roundly mocked for suggesting that some of them could have been staged “€œreverse”€ events to “€œmake people look bad.”€

Apoplectic Bolshevik Bernie Sanders solemnly warned Trump that “€œthe whole world is watching“€ for Trump’s response to the presumed “€œsignificant outbreak of anti-Semitism in our country.”€ Must suck for Bernie that the accused perp of at least eight of these anti-Jew outbreaks is a dedicated Sanders supporter who calls Trump a “€œracist/sexist/capitalist monster.”€

Y’see, Juan Thompson is not your everyday, run-o”€™-the-mill black guy who gets dumped by a mudshark and then tries to frame her for Nazi atrocities. No, he made headlines a couple years ago when he was fired from his writing gig at Glenn Greenwald’s Intercept. Juan used to be a writer. But now he is a “€œdisgraced left-wing journalist.”€ If you prefer, he’s a “€œdisgraced former journalist.”€ Put more simply, he’s a “€œdisgraced former reporter.”€

He was brought on the staff of The Intercept not technically as an affirmative action hire but as part of a desperate rush to “€œdiversify”€ after the overwhelmingly Jewish staff at The Nation complained that The Intercept wasn”€™t racially diverse enough.

So they hire this coal-black self-described “€œcub reporter,”€ he writes a series of articles about how police are evil and white people are evil, too, and he even achieves a squib of viral fame with a purported scoop about how Charleston shooter Dylann Roof’s cousin Scott said that Dylann became obsessed with white-power ideology after a girl left him for a black guy. The problem is that Thompson pulled the entire story out of his musty, lying rectum; no such “€œScott Roof”€ exists. The discovery that Thompson is a serial fabulist led to his dismissal from The Intercept, which naturally led to Thompson accusing The Intercept and the entire publishing industry of racism. (Amusingly, he referred to himself as having been the site’s “€œtoken negro whisperer.”€)

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