The Hard Stuff

I’m gonna start by talking about the porn girl I lived with, then segue into the actors’ strike and end on politics. Yep, ol’ Dave will deftly manipulate three balls at once. So, speaking of porn... For me, two years of living with a porn star were more than enough. Actually, one was more than enough. And for the record, she lived with me so ...


From Bad to Verse

Are all modern-day popular poems really secretly written by Oprah Winfrey? It may well be so. Amanda Gorman, the unbearable young black American “poet” catapulted to undeserved stardom after she performed her shitty little ditty of ...

Moloch the God

Never Mind the Molochs: Here’s the Sex-Changers!

In 2019 Christian satire site The Babylon Bee ran a story, “Moloch Announces Forcing Your Kids To Become Transgender Is Acceptable Form Of Sacrifice.” Here, the bloodthirsty, cattle-headed ancient Middle Eastern god of the ...

Pessimistic River

Call it prescience...or bad timing. The moment I finished last week’s column, Pew released a poll proving my point about the difference between 1970s urban blight and that of the present; how it comes down to optimism back then (the ...

Shirkling the Drain

“Circling the drain.” It’s a phrase I first heard in a non-plumbing context when a doctor said it in reference to my elderly father’s condition. It basically means dying, but not yet dead. The end seems certain, but the patient ...

Rightists Drown in Steve Bannon’s Flood

Actor Michael Landon, born Oygenglayben Schmuelowitz (memo to self: Confirm that before press time), was the handsome star of Bonanza and Little House on the Prairie (I just lost every millennial reader). Landon’s mother was severely ...

Black & White TV

When I was a child, there was a persistent playground rumor that the letters “BMW” in the German car manufacturer’s brand name secretly stood for “Black Man’s Willy,” a “willy” being an infant British slang term for a ...

Overton Window to the Soul

One of the frustrations of writing a weekly column is that sometimes you wrap a piece, post it, and that very day the Special Olympians of public discourse provide fodder you wish you’d been able to include. I’d just finished ...

Woke Joke

In these willfully ignorant times, the powers that be seem, in their haste to be politically correct, to forget that America fought its bloodiest war to end human bondage. Almost three-quarters of a million men died, yet the Civil War ...


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