I just flew back from England, and boy are my arms tired of the way their middle class sees the world—especially when ours is headed in the same direction. Their media is currently blabbing on and on about Gypsies—sorry, “Irish Travellers”―being kicked off a nature preserve called Dale ...

After getting screamed at by my liberal friends for doubting their doom and gloom predictions, one unavoidably oversized fact stuck in my slim, streamlined craw: People ARE getting fat. The average lifespan has been on a steady climb since we began recording it, but medical experts say this is ...

When pestered about their pedagoguery, the politically correct left insists they need to police our language because “words are powerful” and “words have meaning.” Calling a woman a “slut” can ruin her life unless she’s at a SlutWalk, in which case the word has come full-circle and is ...

A couple of weeks ago, I was ragging on conservatives and wanted to include how Tea Partiers pretend to be all about spending cuts but won’t touch the two biggies, Social Security and the military. It was my final point, and it ended the whole list with a bang. Unfortunately, the editors like to ...

I hate when a famous junkie dies and we get empty gestures like, “We just lost a legend the likes of which we will never see again.” Why not say, “That cute English girl who became the personification of a walking mess took the whole thing too far and apparently OD’d on a cocktail of ...

The left gets a serious going-over on this site. Not that they don’t deserve it. If you come screaming into the room with an aluminum water bottle on your backpack and start ridiculing everyone for being ignorant, people are going to make fun of you. It’s fun to expose liberal hypocrisy, but ...

There is a phenomenon here in the Northeast where being conservative—no, wait, being not left—is to turn everyone in the room into Donald Sutherland from Invasion of the Body Snatchers, screaming and pointing at you as if you’re an alien pod person. I hear Berkeley is bad, and Madison is the ...

In the frothing debate over what energy resources we should use to stay on top, natural gas keeps bubbling to the surface. Oil has become too costly, and not only in financial terms. At the risk of sounding Gaye, war is not the answer. “Drill, baby, drill” makes for a great campaign slogan, but ...

Now that UCLA has a takeout service called Ching-Chong-Ling-Long, we can finally put Alexandra Wallace’s racist rant behind us. Nothing says “our cultural wounds have healed” like a sarcastic restaurant. For those of you who missed it, on March 13th Wallace posted a disgusting video wherein ...

If you get into a Brooklyn taxi and don’t see a Puerto Rican flag, ask the driver, “So what’s the deal with the Puerto Ricans?” Without exception, all cabdrivers who are not themselves Puerto Ricans will launch into an indignant and animated rant that includes the words “lazy,” ...