Hoping Against Hope in Detroit

"€œWe"€™re coming back,"€ beamed current Detroit mayor and former Detroit Pistons All-Star Dave Bing last Tuesday as he launched a privately funded $10-million ad campaign designed to instill hope, foster confidence, inspire team spirit, and spread a positive message among the waning ...

Mark Twain and his friend John Lewis in 1903

Huckleberry Finn and the Whitewashing of American History

By its editor's count, 219 "€œniggers"€ have been expunged from a reprint of Mark Twain's Adventures of Huckleberry Finn that’s being foisted on our humiliatingly sensitive world next month by Alabama-based NewSouth Books"€”218 from the book itself and one "€œnigger"€ from the ...

Last Month in Israel: Bagellnacht Rising?

In Israel these days, about half of the Jews"€”the ones who say Arabs are no big problem"€”are having big problems with the other half of the Jews who say the Arabs are a very big problem. This could prove to be a very, very big problem for Israel. Zionism is based on a tribal concept, and we ...

The DREAM Act: ¿Reconquista Mañana?

Countless self-described "€œDreamers"€ were rudely awakened on December 18th when the US Senate failed to reach the 60 votes necessary to proceed with the DREAM (Development, Relief, and Education for Alien Minors) Act, a bill which in various forms has been trying to squeeze itself through ...

Psychos and Zombies: Mutant Spawn of the Great Recession

Last Tuesday night, a fat, rumpled, unemployed 56-year-old man named Clay Duke invaded a Florida school-board meeting and put on a clumsy show of violent political theater before killing himself. Duke brandished a gun, commanded all the women to leave, spray-painted a large red "€œV"€ (for ...

Posthumously Pardoning the Lizard King’s Penis

Sixties rock deity Jim "€œThe Lizard King"€ Morrison's bloated corpse was found in a Parisian bathtub in 1971, but apparently his soul had been writhing in restless torment until last Thursday, when lame-duck Florida Governor Charlie Crist finally pardoned him for allegedly flashing his dingus ...

Julian Assange’s Honey Trap: That’s Rape in Sweden

Julian Assange of Wikileaks infamy was arrested in England today. But it isn"€™t for espionage"€”his Interpol "€œred notice"€ made no mention of the hundreds of thousands of classified government documents he has released illegally over the past year. Neither does it mention the word ...

No Child’s Fat Behind: Palin Dumps on Michelle Obama’s Youth Obesity Scheme

Last week, in her inimitably cornpone, hokey, chipper, toothy, gosh-darnit, you’re-darn-tootin’ manner, Sarah Palin slammed Michelle Obama's scheme to slim the nation's bloated quotient of disgustingly fat children. Palin told radio host Laura Ingraham: Take Michelle ...

Combat Training for Toddlers

My first and only kid was born two years ago, and I almost didn’t live to see him. A month before he hatched, a jumbo brain tumor knocked me unconscious. I turned blue and was legally dead for a few moments before my eight-months-pregnant wife applied mouth-to-mouth. An ambulance came, ...

Diagnosing “€œPassover Syndrome”€ Among White Liberals

There's something to be said for the almost universal leftist tendency to ignore unpleasant facts in favor of smearing their opponents as mentally ill. Not only is it far easier than constructing a coherent argument, it often works marvelously as a propaganda technique. Therefore, I can"€™t see ...